Blues clues

I couldn't get what isn't mine.

Of course, I couldn't and I won't even try.

So I would just stay still.

There are a lot of things I could do.

I can move on.

I have already developed a lot of defense mechanisms, mostly good, for myself, for the things I get frustrated from.

And I don't interfere most of the time.

I stay silent when I know it is the best thing to do.

And now I would just stay silent about these raging hormones for you.

I would just stay silent until it all subsides.

I would just write songs, you wouldn't know, for you.

That's the best I do.

I'm best at keeping it all.

I could get an award for that. :)

I'm best at pretending.

Pretending that I don't feel anything.

Pretending that you don't affect me at all.

Because that is the best way not to be hurt.

Don't get me wrong.

I actually don't feel any hurt most of the time.

I'm actually happy for you, for the one you see, for the one you like, you love.

Because just like how I admire you, I admire her too.

There are some things about her that I also like and I also feel strange about.

And if there are two people I want to be together in this world, that would be you two.

I just feel that both of you are good for each other.

Just be more responsible for her, okay?

Yeah, I know you wouldn't read this. Well, just in case. If perchance you come across this page and come to get what I was trying to tell you, it is here. It is for you.

You are a good friend. You do things for people, not anyone would even care to do. Maybe that was why I liked you. You are a kind creature, even just for a friend.

What I really do hope now is that we stay as friends. That we could do more things together (as friends of course).

I wanted to travel the country, hike some mountains, hear more beautiful songs--but I wouldn't prefer all that to include you; but of course, if perhaps you wouldn't mind, I would want to. What a silly sentence I just wrote.

Well, where is this letter-like diary leading to?

I prefer it to lead to the bottom line that I am just here for you, as you are, most of the time, there to help me out too.

Thank you for making my life a bit more exciting and alive again, and plus the things I learn from you. :)

Just keep it up. Keep inspiring other people, BUT don't make them all fall in love with you, OH PLEASE. Haha. You're just too easy to be liked. #